The Danger of Anger And How to Decrease It

BEING angry is uncrontrolable, right? Wrong! You can decide whether you will continue on your anger or stop it once you think it is useless to do it. We are not  Donald Duck which is unable to control anger. Anger is not beyond our capacity to cope with. Let alone our own anger. It is only a matter of habits. The more trained you are to control your anger, the easier you do it  when you are in anger. I remember one of my bosses. He was so mad at one of his inferiors. In an office meeting, he showed his anger with his harsh words doubting his inferior's professional capacity. But at the same time, he blinked one of his eyes humorously to me showing that his anger was not at me. I think his anger was professional capacity. But at the same time, he blinked one of his eyes humorously to me showing that his anger was not at me. I think his anger was professional, not personal. He is the one who is capable of using anger, not be used by it.


Uncontroable anger is dangerous. It can kill you because it causes a heart attack to someone. Some researchers show that hostility of anger hurts heart. When someone is angry, his heart doesn't get the blood it needs. Mistrust triggers an outpouring of adrenalin and other stress hormones that soon affects physically. The angry man's voice usually turns into a higher pitch. The rate and depth of his breathing increases. His heart beat faster and harder. And the muscles of his arms and legs tighten. Such a physical condition can be very dangerous to some people.

Hostility or anger can be minimised by trusting people. Great religions teach the virtues of a trusting heart. Bad predujice and hostility are wrong. Not because they are dogmatic, but because they are proven to be dangerous for physical balance and our health. So, try to trust people more. Clean up your mind of bad prejudice about people. Reduce your cynical mistrust of others. And decrease the frequency and intensity of your anger. Start learning to treat others with kindness and consideration.


These steps might be of help for you :


1. Acknowledge the problem


Let people around you, girlfriend, best friends, members of family, or even classmates---know that you intend to control your anger. Ask them for support.


2. Reason with yourself.


When cynically hostile through strike, abolish them right away. Never keep these bad thoughts too long in your mind. Be rational to what you think of people. This will help you regain the right perspective.


3. Think like the others.


Put yourself in another person's shoes. This way, start to understand his viewpoint, his behavior, or even his reasons. This will help you leave your anger behind. Empathy and hostility are opposite to each other. Grow your empathy on people. There are always good sides on them, anyway.


4. Laugh at yourself.


Humor is the best way to usher off your suspicion of people. Make fun of your prejudice and suspicious nature. Refuse to keep any suspicion in mind. And be good at laughing at yourself for your unreasonable mistrust.


5. Practice trust.


Try to trust people when the opportunities come. Let people in ticket agent pick a seat in a bus for us, for example. Try to get calmer, and let people do things for us. The fact that you don't have to control things around you yourself sometimes is relaxing. And this can be a great exercise for trusting others. Believe that there are more good guys that the bad ones in this world.


6. Be positive.


If you are badly mistreated, you are normally angry. Let the opportunity to be aggressively angry to others go off. If the one who offends is someone who need not to have contact with you, stay away. Such a quarrel is not worth getting. If you think you have to settle things up with him, let him know calmly what bothers you and how. Never let yourself be as rude as the offender. If you want to win in argumentation, you should learn to loose--by being calm.


7. Forgive them.


Religions always teach us to forgive. As God Himself is forgiving. So try to learn to forgive those who offend you. The more you train yourself in forgiving. The easier you do it and the more peaceful you will be. 


8. Start right now.


Whether you are used to being angry around the clock, it doesn't mean that you can not start practicing today. Make a self-commitment, and give it try. And pray God to help you to control your anger. There is nothing easy to change; yet for your own goodness, everything is worth starting. And it means NOW. Remember Epictetus who said; Reckon the days in which you have not been angry. I used to be angry everyday; now every other day; than every third and fourth day; and if you miss it so long as thirty days, offer a sacrifice of thanksgiving to God.

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