How to Handle Stress Just Like An Expert (PART 2) ~ Bloggerin Info

The Strong Survive

Salvatore Maddi, professor of psychology and social behaviour at the University of California, Irvine, and president of the Hardiness Institute

According to Maddi's theory of stress management, it's the hardiest who survive. He defines hardiness as a conglomeration of characterictis that make people try to solve stressful problems rather than fall victim to them.

Maddi's theory originated from a 12-year study of American telephone-company employess between 1975 and 1987. During that period, the telecommunication industry was deregulated and the company was dramatically reduced in size. "Stress was rampant, but a third of the employess actually thrived," Maddi says. "We called these workers the 'hardy' ones."

Maddi himself exemplifies the model. "I struggle, like everyone, against the inclination to allow stressors to direct my life," he says.

"But I know in the long run, the best life isn't earned that way. Trying to remain comfortable by avoiding stress is not only unrealistic, but will also force you to shrink your life to the size of a postage stamp. What is important is to solve stressful problems, turning them from potential disasters into opportunities."

Maddie tries to keep what he calls the three Cs foremost in his mind during pressure-cooker times: commitment (being actively involved in life rather than hanging back and feeling alienated); control (trying to influence outcomes instead of being passively influenced by them); and challenge (continuing to learn from positive and negative experiences).

The Gender Influence

Harriet Braiker, pyschologist and author of "The Type of Woman: How to Overcome the stress of Being Everything to Everybody"

The type E woman is the female counterpart of the type A man, the guy most vulnerable to stress-related illness. But while destination -- burnout -- might the same for both personality types, the paths they take to get there are often different. "Type E women are continually anticipating the needs of others at their own expense," Braiker says. "The classic Type E is a woman with multiple roles; she's a career woman, or a dedicated volunteer. You don't have to be married to be a Type E, but if you are, there's typically an intrinsic conflict between what it takes to be a good mother or wife and what it takes to succeed in the other things you do.

"I used to be a Type E," Braiker admits. "But, now I'd characterise myself as very high-achieving. I still have multiple roles --- wife, mother and psychologist -- but I've learned to practise what I preach: I don't say yes to everybody. I delegate tasks. And it's very clear to me what my priorities are."

Those would be Braiker's husband and her nine-year old daughter --- not a spotless kitchen floor.

The Relaxation Response

Dr Herbert Benson, president the Mind/Body Medical Institute, affiliate with Harvard Medical School.

Despite highly respected research showing that what he calls the relaxation response help treat stress-related disorders, Benson avoided using his own therapy for some 20 years. "I was fearful I wouldn't be viewed as objective if I practised it myself," he says. "But when I got older, more established -- and more stressed -- I began to think, This is silly."

Here's how to do it: Choose a word or phrase (ocean or peace, for instance). Sit quietly in a comfortable position, close your eyes and relax your muscles. Breathe slowly, repeating your focus word or words in your mind exhale. If everyday thoughts intrude, let them go, and return to the repetition. Continue for ten to 20 minutes.

Essentially a physiological antidote to the flight-or-flight syndrome, the relaxation response downshifts all the bodily systems that gear up in stressful situations.